Thursday, April 26, 2012

Dealing with Death

 It is the most depressing thing in the world to find out a loved one is dying. It not only causes grief but it also brings you to a realization that every breath you take matters and it shouldn't be wasted.

My mom, in her grief, asked me "Why is God so finicky to let good people suffer while those who are bad live?"

There is no right answer to this. Religion will say it is "God's Will" or it is simply due to the balance of life. However, it is still difficult to accept such ambiguous reasoning. It causes one to wonder if some are more lucky than others. Perhaps some, though good or bad, have extra lives to spare while others barely have one. It is unfair and we always come to the same question, why?

Then again, maybe we are asking the wrong question. Instead we should be asking, why not? Why should good people suffer on this miserable earth where war rages on, poverty is a disease, and there is uncertainty in each day that passes. Why should we want to live in a world that is greedy and unkind to those who are different in race, ethnicity, and class? Maybe dying early is a a blessing in disguise because heaven, if it does exist, is a better place to be. Maybe one person dying paves the way for another to live? Maybe one person dying allows someone to realize their own worth and strength? Maybe one person dying creates fortitude and inspiration amongst the living to keep going and keep fighting?

Our nature as humans is unique because we have something not many animals have. We have emotions and thoughts. We identify with the suffering and we feel compassion. We see the dying and we feel thankful for the life we have. We see sadness and we relish in the happiness than comes our way.

Our journey is fraught with sadness, bad luck, disappointment, stress, and death. Likewise, it is also full of happiness, good luck, success, and life. After all, without one you cannot fully understand the other, right?

Dear mom, you are right. It is unfair for good people to die. I cannot give you a reason why. I cannot lessen the pain. However, we should still make the passing of loved ones memorable. They live on in our actions and our words. So maybe they didn't really die but they lived on in a greater way unknown to us. For that we are better people because of them.

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